Album Review: Extreme Graveyard Tornado – Birdflesh

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“He’s mad, they’d say.  He’s insane.  He’s dangerous.  Well I’ll show them.  I’ll show them all!”

Thanks for the appropriate introduction, Mister Bernard Black.  Although these menacing maniacs aren’t Heading Towards Insanity – they’ve already visited, left, and moved on to crazier things.  What’s that you say?  You don’t know who Birdflesh is?  What the hell is wrong with you!  Birdflesh is a trio of otherworldly beings from Sweden, with members who have been in and/or are in some other pretty stellar bands.  Founded in 1992, they have one original member at this point, but you wouldn’t be able to tell from this album.  They’re still goddamn Birdflesh through and through.

While they spend small, inconsequential amounts of time on “Extreme Graveyard Tornado” (as they would on any album) making their fans question just how mentally ill they may be, there’s no doubt that they still remain the pinnacle of thrashing grinding mayhem, a spot that only heavyweights P.L.F. (who have coincidentally released a split with the almighty Flesh of Birds) have the right to share.  Maybe they’re telling us that they know where they stand when we hear them shout “We are so much better! Than all of you!”, but I could easily be taking those lyrics completely out of context, considering the song title is Rise of Stupidity and this is Birdflesh, one can never be too certain.

You may not be sold on Birdflesh yet.  That’s okay, I get it.  You are new to grindcore, or maybe even extreme music in general.  You look in confusion at the band name, the album title (honestly, who else could get away with naming an album “Extreme Graveyard Tornado“), and then there are the track titles – Crazy Train DecapitationAccused of SuicideGUACAMOLESTATION OF THE TACORPSE!!!  Okay, that one is a personal favorite.  Regardless, if you find yourself in this position, there’s one thing that I, and bands like Birdflesh have to say to you – its extreme music, don’t take it so goddamn seriously.  Have fucking fun with it!

As mentioned, we are well aware that Birdflesh will grind you up and thrash you around better than most, if not all that oppose them.  As an apex Grind Band, they are at the top of the grindcore food chain.  They definitely waste no time in hitting you as hard as possible with their relentless grindcore from the very beginning of “Extreme Graveyard Tornado“, but it didn’t take long for them to start injecting every single trademark that makes them great into this album.  If there’s one thing that they know how to play as well as grindcore, its thrash, and they combine the two styles so seamlessly on this album that it should be considered its own entity.  There are at least a couple of tracks here that will make you think that Sergeant D himself is coming for you.  That’s right, you’re on his list.

Let’s not sell Birdflesh short on all of that though.  We’ve established that they love to have fun, that they play grindcore as furious as an “Extreme Graveyard Tornado“, and that they have a conveniently pocket-sized, mutated cousin of Sergeant D from Creepsylvania tucked away somewhere.  They still have other nifty tricks up their sleeves.  Sprinkled throughout this 27 minute and 10 second clusterfuck of twenty four breathtakingly beautiful and exquisitely eloquent songs you will find a veritable variety of delectably delicious spices.  If you’re familiar with extreme music in general and enjoy all of its various nuances then you’ll definitely appreciate them here.  Touches of blackened cod… er… riffs, smoldering keyboards, surprisingly delightful melodies, and a treasure trove of other miscellaneous surprises await.

If you’re a long-standing fan of Birdflesh as I am, then you’ll probably buy this without even bothering to read anything I just wrote.  It’s a new Birdflesh album; of corpse you must have it!  You’ve essentially known what to expect since Coffinfucker sensually licked your ear canals (or maybe you were licked by The Hungry Vagina).  If you’re new to Birdflesh, you’re in for what I can assume will be an even wilder ride, but be sure to check your reservations at the door – if you go into this with a proverbial stick up your ass; you’re going to get fucked raw.  Did they say “Extreme Grindcore Tornado”?  No?  They might as well have.

Oh, and you may notice what appears to be an anomaly with my numerical rating for this album.  Yeah, that isn’t an anomaly.  Birdflesh took those “turn it up to 11” dweebs and smashed their faces into 14.  What up, bitch!

Rating: 7/5

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